I have many excuses. For everything. Read my book, Stop Lying, and you'll hear all about excuses. Crazy making. And just because I dealt with lifestyle excuses, doesn't mean I don't have a gazillion other excuses for a gazillion other things in my life. I know it's human nature, but I still make myself freaking crazy sometimes. Anyway, here's an excuse/story. I hardly read anymore. Seriously. Crazy for a writer to say. I used to read two books a week. But here's my life, I work full time, I write at night, I have friends, I do this healthy living thing and I required about seven to eight hours of sleep at night. I find it really hard to fit anything else into most days. And with reading, I found that I can't read the genre I'm writing - it tends to get confused in my head. So I started not reading while I was actively writing a first draft of a book. And then I just stopped reading almost altogether. Like maybe three books a year. It made me crazy, too. People were talking about some great books: Life of Pi, Room, Twilight (LOL). So I decided I would buy them and read them in between writing contracts. Well I think I had life of Pi for five years before I finally read it. Wow - amazing book by the way! I had surgery three years ago and decided on my eight week recuperation I would read my face off. Well, I forgot to factor in the sleeping and exhaustion and weakness ... but I did ask my dad to buy me a book instead of sending me flowers and he did. Twilight. I mean everyone was talking about it. So during recuperation I read the Twilight series. I feel dirty saying that. I mean, nothing against Stephanie Meyers, more power to her. I, too, want an international bestseller please. But honestly the story is merely annoying, perhaps interesting to the prepubescent girls - okay and lots of other people - but the writing and story crafting was less than I was hoping for. That was the first book I read in almost two years. Oi vay. So, I decided it was time to start reading again. I don't think you can be a good writer if you're not a reader. So I'm fitting reading in. But it's hard - currently, Fifty Shades of Gray is sweeping the nation. I had a friend that read it so I asked her to tell me all about it. Well, she said, it's about 10% story and 90% titillation. And she LOVED it. Cool. Good for her. (SPOILER ALERT) However, I am not at all into BDSM (bondage, domination, sadomasochism) but not judging you if you are; I am not into 10% storyline, I am not into the romance of some little virgin getting all wrapped in n the incredibly softened and romanticized world of BDSM, which has been turned into soft core porn for this story. And possibly more bad writing. For me, I need something in a novel - I need good writing OR a well crafted plot-line OR enticing characters. Of course, sometimes you can actually get two or three of those all in one novel. But that miraculous happening aside, I need at least one. So new rule for me, I'm not buying the #1 bestseller any more until I have received a couple of honest reviews from people I trust. Remember, I'm not judging you if you loved Fifty Shades of Grey - it's what has kept True Story and Harlequin in business all these years - but say it for what it is, folks, don't call it GREAT FICTION. I'm choosing my books differently. Now, that being said, I am currently reading A Game of Thrones. I admit, I retrieved the book from our recycling room. I admit I am enjoying the HBO series. But I also admit I quite like the storyline in the book. I think the author has crafted this interesting world and he is explaining it to me well and making me want to know more about its people. Do you know what I was thinking when I read Twilight? Two things - OMG this has to get better and How many more pages left? What are you reading and why?

Where'd all the fun go?

I haven't written anything for a while here. Why? Because there's nothing that's made me feel passionate or inspired enough. Where's all the interesting stuff gone on the internet? Why isn't anyone fighting or arguing or even just saying stupid things that we can all talk about? I mean since Disney closed their fat kids ride, everything is just boring. Even half the people who's blogs I read haven't posted much this week. I thought the dog days were August, not March. Come on people, give me something.

Perhaps it's because my place is torn apart in renos too - which is crushing whatever spirit I might have left. LOL Hopefully that dust will settle soon (four weeks I think).

Maybe I just need some sunshine. Maybe that's where all my bloggies are - out enjoying the spring. I'm going to try that too.

Maybe I'll see you out there.

Yippee

Freedom 1/Censors 0. PayPal did not cave! You can all have A Very Bad Day for FREE one day only. Coupon code VA35N. Enjoy!

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/68017

Writing it down

I'm curious. I've started reading blogs. I'm really not sure how I feel about blogs, she says while writing any entry into hers. But blogs seem to be a way to express yourself, but more than that. If it were just an expression, then you wouldn't hit the publish button, right? You'd keep it to yourself. So because you publish a blog, are you seeking support, companionship, justification?

I'm also curious because I see people stop writing when bad things happen. Specifically, what I've noticed this month, is that when people who are trying to lose weight are losing weight - they are writing blog entries every single day. When they are struggling and/or gaining, they disappear. Well, we know that not writing it down doesn't mean it isn't happening. Whether you blog or not, you are still gaining weight. So if the blog was to reach out, then why aren't you reaching out now, when you most need the support?

So I want to know why people blog. And why people only blog during the good times.

I know I blog for a couple of reasons. I blog to market my writing, I blog because I don't have a diary. I blog because I live alone and sometimes I just have to say something - and blogging feels like I'm saying it to someone.

So if anyone is reading, I'm curious as to what blogging means to you.

PayPal as censor?

It has always been my belief that freedom of speech is one of the hardest freedoms to enforce. It's easy when we're all happy and having a lively political debate. But it's hard when the freedom we are upholding is some more sinister - say erotic fiction versus illegal sexuality.

Okay, as a given the internet has allowed more access to pornography than anything else. It did not become the information superhighway, it became a peephole into any number of sensual to sick practices you care to read or watch. And I've found that eBooks have done the same with fiction. Smashwords, who is the eBook distributor (other than Amazon, they supply all the other eBook stores) is full of erotic fiction. And now that people can self publish this nonsense (my freedom to say that), the shelved are teeming with it. Some fun and flirty, some disgusting. Smashwords has always had filters on for illegal acts, such as underage exploitation. But apparently there is also a huge market for incest fiction (i.e. stepparent with stepchild as grownup). Does nothing for me, but if it floats your boat, right? So where does that line end and who monitors its crossing? Well, PayPal has decided they will be the morality monitor. They are going to remove their services from Smashwords if Smashwords does not remove underage erotica (again, they already monitor for that) bestiality fiction, rape for titillation and incest.

Wow.

See, a part of me goes yah! Who needs to read that shit. But then guess what? I've been officially censored too. Yep, I have a short story, it's a short murder mystery, but there is some nonconsensual sex in it (or is there - without giving anything away, this short story involves a lot of misdirection) and because of that, I have been asked to remove it from the Smashwords distribution site and their catalogue. So from now on, the only people that will read A Very Bad Day are those who are compatible with the Amazon format. And sadly, I think this short story is one of the best things I've ever constructed. Sadly, murder mysteries sometimes involve violence against women.

And it's not just that, I'm outlining my seventh Kate Carpenter mystery - and it was going to involve the disappearance of a child. But not, I can't go there in case it gets censored. I was already thinking that I'm going to have to change it to an 18 year old college student. Changes the whole face and feel of the story. And don't get me wrong, nothing was going to happen to the child, we weren't even going to see the child from disappearance to end of book on her return. But I can't risk my income stream being interrupted by some random computer search picking up one random word in the 96,000 that will become that book and banning me.

Do I feel that the overall quality of eBooks needs to be controlled? Oh yes. With the evolution of self publishing, there is so much poorly written, unedited, unconstructed boring crap out there that I pity the public (and myself) sorting through what they want to spend their money on. Do I think this is the way to do it? No, I don't.

I would like to say I do admire the way Smashwords is handling this - I'm not about badmouthing them. They are doing what I'm doing - figuring out how to get through this with an intact business model. But PayPal, I think you're veering off the path.

Just curious - does PayPal offer their services on porn sites? I've never paid for porn, and I'm curious about that.

Freedom of speech - what a concept. I'd be interested to hear what you have to say. And just for fun, I'm going to make A Very Bad Day free on Amazon.com 99 cents, so you can read what's been censored and decide for yourself. I'd make it free but Amazon won't let me. ; )

http://www.amazon.com/Very-bloody-short-story-ebook/dp/B00579E6PY/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&qid=1330177547&sr=8-7

Some days I just want to write something

I can't believe I miss having a blog? When I did it the first time, it was cathartic sometimes (like when my first cat died) but it never really did anything for me. But somedays, I just want to write something. I guess for me it's like a diary, but I hate writing longhand, gotta type. So I'm coming back to this one, once in a while, maybe more. Don't know how much I have to say.

I do have to say I'm very interested in this new Disney "ride" or "experience" where it's about fighting fat. Really not sure how I feel about that. Now a lot of villains are fat (think Austin Powers, The Little Mermaid as the first two off the top of my head) - but we've never beaten them by shooting broccoli guns at them. I think what really saddens me is the fact that it seems a lot of parents have given up responsibility for raising their children. We're blaming the teachers, the school systems, the daycares, and now Disney is taking responsibility for teaching nutrition? It starts at home. By the way, I'd like to know if Disney is still serving theme park crap food near this new "ride" or if they're serving tossed salads?

If you're interested in this, google Yonni Freedhoff (he has an interesting blog period if you have food challenges) and read about it. I'd love to know how you think.

Responsibility is a funny thing though. For ages, I thought if I knew what was responsible for my weight loss, I would magically lose weight. Be psychologically restored to normal (LOL find normal). And really, what I had to take responsibility for was what I was shoving in my mouth and the fact that I wasn't moving. I'm all for getting psychological help - believe me - but I realized I can take responsibility for what I'm putting in my mouth and take responsibility for getting psychologically sound as two different items. I didn't have to find the answers BEFORE I lost weight. Just like love, give up the bad habits and open yourself up to be loved and you never know what might happen. But back to this Disney thing, seriously, fat people are villains, they just wear their coping mechanisms. It's nothing to feel guilty about, it's just a good idea to change behaviours that aren't working for you. IMHO

There, I wrote! Have a fun day and eat broccoli, don't toss it at fat villains.

Big News

Kate Carpenter is coming out in e-book format!




It's true and I'm very excited.

House Report, the first book in the series, should be available in June 2011, with the second book, Evening the Score, coming out in July.

I have lots of other projects this year, so we may not get the third book out until the New Year, but we'll try really hard not to keep you waiting too long.

The most exciting news is there should be a new Kate Carpenter available in early spring, after all have books have been re-released, called Ghost of a Chance. It's an exciting supernatural read, as Kate meets Cam's parents for the first time, and some of his older (and dead) ancestors, as well.

We're planning a really exciting book launch this summer - if you want to come, send me an email and I'll get you on the invitation list!

Deborah